Doctorgrosz

To the young parents (and my fellow dorks)

Thu, 11 Apr 2013 23:25:06 -0400

When I was a kid, my father had a subscription to OMNI Magazine as well as a subscription to Car & Driver; the latter of which made me fall in love with horsepower and PJ O’Rourke’s writing style because I was - apparently - “too young” to read the work of Hunter S. Thompson. After all, it’s far better to have your kid reading about illicit street racing (and questionable right-wing politics) than illicit street drugs, right?

OMNI was an amazing magazine. It was science and science fiction combined. You didn’t have to believe that sidebar about crop-circles, but the article about the military’s vertical-takeoff warplanes was fucking AMAZING!

OMNI combined with a steady diet of Jack Kirby, Gary Gygax and Ray Bradbury might have been a subtle/inadvertent attempt from my parents to keep girls away from me until my late teens, but I doubt it. And while that hypothetical proposal proved to be primarily true, I don’t regret a moment of the imagination, inquiry and fantasy.

Parents: raise your kids to think, to daydream, to invent realities that don’t exist yet. Or, as The Kids call it: “being a dork.” It makes life a lot easier down the road. Being awesome at a sport gives you bad knees and a series of cortisone injections - being an awesome dungeon-master gives you a good job in the tech sector.

…and for all of you other dorks who loved OMNI… BAM!!!!!

https://archive.org/search.php?query=collection%3Aomni-magazine&sort=-publicdate

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Fri, 15 Mar 2013 11:59:42 -0400

Your Storm is Worse Than My Storm.

Fri, 08 Feb 2013 18:44:00 -0500

Yeah, I get it… You live in Rochester or Ithaca or any town in Vermont.

If you live in any of these places, odds are you own a four-wheel-drive vehicle. You also have a “big-box” store nearby where you can buy 16 chicken pot pies, an HDTV, a PlayStation, a keg of Sierra Nevada, 100 gallons of bottled water, and a month’s worth of DVDs for well below retail value. All that shit is then forklifted to your car by a smiling white dude. When you get home, you pull your car into a driveway (if not an attached garage) and then you evenly distribute your storm sundries betwixt your main refrigerator and the “beer fridge” in the garage and you hunker down for the weekend.

Tonight, I needed hot sauce, a bottle of vodka, two bottles of tonic water, Ziploc bags, and a jar of peppercorns. I couldn’t locate the peppercorns. The rest of my items required four different locations - the cheapest item was the Ziploc bags at $4.99 - cheaper than the tonic water.

I walked over 16 NYC blocks in terrible weather, slipping and falling numerous times to SIMPLY GET TONIC WATER AND PEPPER.

Oh, and after you’ve hit all these four places? You’re still WALKING home, carrying all of this shit, just so you can sit in your overpriced apartment pretending that you’re erudite and urban after you’ve slipped on your ass and broken the bottle of hot sauce.

Yeah, I get it, South Dakota… You have really fucking abysmal winters. You also have 38lbs of venison curing in your barn. Most of us in NYC can’t buy more than 4 rolls of toilet paper at a time because we have nowhere to store it, much less a way to carry a monolithic construction of double-ply home to our hovel.

POINT: You can’t dis a bitchy New Yorker in winter unless you’ve lived in New York for a winter. Our lives suck even when things are good.

"Dr. Grosz" (Brian, revised) oil on canvas, 30 x 48in., 2/2/2013

Sun, 03 Feb 2013 12:10:05 -0500

postmodernpost:

hey… that’s me!

My Letter to the Boy Scouts of America

Tue, 29 Jan 2013 23:30:00 -0500

To Whom it May Concern at the Boy Scouts of America:

About 17 years ago, I achieved the rank of Eagle Scout through Troop 3 in Old Greenwich, CT. My personal experience with scouting taught me thousands of life-lessons and opened more than a few doors in my professional life.

Admittedly, I was embarrassed in my early 20s to be an Eagle; as a musician in a rock and roll band, it simply wasn’t “cool.” But the knowledge that I learned through scouting helped me lead, manage, mediate conflict, and fix any gear that ever broke down (which it often did).

As I grew older and progressed on my life-path, I began to realize how often the personal and professional skills I learned through scouting were influencing both my life and the lives of people around me. People always seem shocked when they ask, “How did you learn to do THAT?” And I answer: “In the Boy Scouts.” Maybe I simply don’t look the part…

I can still repeat both the Scout Oath, Law, and Motto to this day. And while I may not always adhere to a few of the words in the Scout Law (namely: “cheerful,” “obedient,” “clean,” and “reverent”), I firmly believe in the rest of them.

I am TRUSTWORTHY. If I make a promise to someone, I keep it. Namely, I made a promise to myself long ago that I would speak out for anyone who was being unjustly disenfranchised. I stand by that vow to myself for the sake of the world around me.

I am LOYAL. That includes all of my friends, family, and community - regardless of their sexual orientation.

I am HELPFUL. That’s why I’m writing to you now. I was taught never to discriminate and my experience with the Scouts reinforced that belief. After all, I’m LOYAL to my homosexual friends and family; I can be TRUSTED to write a letter on our collective belief of anti-discrimination if I believe I can make a difference. Most importantly, I TRUST that a young man’s sexual identity does not preclude him from learning the wonderful life-skills that scouting could teach the world - if the B.S.A. could stop being so exclusionary. If the B.S.A. was truly HELPFUL, they’d be offering their knowledge and experience to everyone without judgement or discrimination. (My own sexual orientation does not mean that I’m the only one who should know how to tie a knot, build a fire or in a twist of irony - if you like to believe in stereotypes - weave a basket.)

I am COURTEOUS. I’ve attempted to write you a sensible letter that is devoid of harsh accusation and foul language, despite both being my greatest urges upon this matter.

I am KIND. Are you?

I am BRAVE - as are the young men who have found a way to “come out” at such a young age. In the cruel world of teenage social-politics, I can honestly think of nothing more BRAVE.

It would be a great achievement if an organization like the B.S.A. could cast off their antiquated beliefs and actually start believing in the strongest and most prescient points of their own teachings.

Unfortunately, the world has always been filled with hate and discrimination. If we are ever to overcome this fact, what better way to find a solution to these problems than to begin with the minds of young men?

I sincerely hope that you will allow any young man to participate in scouting and become a great man of the future.

Brian Grosz

29 January 2013

[UPDATE: if you would like to write to the BSA to express your thoughts, you can and should - nationalsupportcenter@scouting.org]

"The Iron never lies to you."

Sun, 06 Jan 2013 19:30:32 -0500

“The Iron never lies to you.”

- My 2012 didn’t begin badly, but it didn’t begin well. Most of the people I knew were still alive, my loving girlfriend was still putting up with my OCD behavior, and I had managed to squeeze in a series of appointments for the backpiece tattoo that I had been mulling over for a few years.

But 2011 saw a 50% decrease in my income from 2010. Savings could save the mortgage, but for how long? According to the authorities, I made 10% in 2012 of what I made in 2011. You can do the math on your own, but at it’s simplest: my yearly statement is currently missing a zero. A BIG zero.

Despite being an artist, I’ve always loved economics, facts, trends and equations. This is why I’ve spent the last 16 months waking up in a cold sweat at 3am. And at 6am. And usually again at 9am.

Life is cyclical. Ebb and flow. Give and take.

In the arts, you’re only as good as your last job (and in my line of work, your last job is only good if it hits the airwaves).

And, as my father the cabinet-maker often says: “I’ve had the gun in my mouth so many times, I’m starting to enjoy the taste!”

I’ve been out of the gym for a year because we were working on my back. It’s hard to work out when you have blood coming out of your spine and you don’t want to split the skin that’s covering a piece of art that you’re paying $300/hour for.

I don’t know what 2013 holds for me. I certainly hope it holds something better. But I know it has to start with The Iron.

Back in the gym tomorrow…

(read the full article from Uncle Hank here)

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Mon, 24 Dec 2012 13:48:35 -0500

“sub-genre,” my ass…

Wed, 12 Dec 2012 13:02:53 -0500

“sub-genre,” my ass…

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Sun, 09 Dec 2012 12:51:29 -0500

Texting with Dad about Brubeck

Wed, 05 Dec 2012 15:40:07 -0500

Me: Dave Brubeck - dead at 91.
Dad: Woulda been 92 tomorrow. RIP. Apparently he was on his way to his cardiologist.
Me: 91 ain't a bad run.
Dad: Not unless it's your time that's up. At 91, I might be kicking, crying and screaming "NO" all the way out.
Me: You'll have to reason with the rest of us to let you live that long first.

Mazel Tov, motherfucker.

Wed, 05 Dec 2012 12:20:43 -0500

Mazel Tov, motherfucker.

jayfingers: Nostrils and eyes. Drunken shenanigans. Stolen from...

Mon, 03 Dec 2012 12:16:35 -0500

jayfingers:

Nostrils and eyes. Drunken shenanigans. Stolen from @doctorgrosz. Shout to @blinki_bathgate (at The Alibi)

"In this ultra-connected life we lead, most of us are little more than our avatars. If the power is..."

Fri, 02 Nov 2012 13:35:48 -0400

“In this ultra-connected life we lead, most of us are little more than our avatars. If the power is out, the Internet is out… and, by proxy, you’re out.”

- My piece for the Daily Dot “You Can’t Pack The Internet” just went live. Click here to read it in full.

Marisa and I went as Tank Girl and Booga for Halloween....

Wed, 31 Oct 2012 13:01:00 -0400

Marisa and I went as Tank Girl and Booga for Halloween. Here’s a dope TG tattoo from Bryan Hall.

NYC Go-Bag/Bug-Out-Bag

Mon, 29 Oct 2012 17:01:00 -0400

My GB/BOB is a little extensive and, if I do have to evacuate, the authorities are probably going to have problems with a few contents of my bag. But, I’ve had enough people ask me about what to pack, so I wanted to make this list for my friends. Let’s start with the most basic of go-bags…

THE BASIC BAG:

In a ziploc bag, place the following:

- passport

- copies of your credit cards and drivers license (have a printer/scanner? USE IT!)

- cash (at least $100)

- any necessary medications

- a fire/light source (preferably a flashlight AND a cigarette lighter)

- also suggested: a map/atlas, notebook, several pens

In another ziploc, place three pairs of thick socks and a spare set of keys to your home. Put both in a sensible BACKPACK (not a shoulder bag or tote) along with the following:

- flashlight with extra batteries

- an extra pair of pants and two clean shirts (if you wear undergarments, pack a few pairs). do NOT go hog-wild with the clothes. this is a disaster, not a fashion show.

- chargers for all of your devices (there’s a strong chance that you won’t have power, but better safe than sorry) and extra batteries for said devices when/where applicable

- at LEAST one gallon of potable water

- non-perishable food items. power bars or military MREs are preferred due to their size and weight. canned items are less than ideal and will weigh you down, but if all you’ve got are three cans of beef stew, take em!

And the obvious:

- have a raincoat, sensible (waterproof) shoes and headgear readily available

- don’t forget your wallet.

- if you have a first-aid kit, PACK IT. same goes for any kind of multitool (containing a knife, screwdriver, pliers, etc)

IF YOU WANT TO STEP UP YOUR BAG:

- at least 50’ of rope

- hand-crank radio/flashlight combo (I have two - an AM/FM radio with extra batteries will also do the trick in a pinch)

- duct tape

- military MREs

- zip ties

- emergency blanket

- flares/glow-sticks

- flint/steel

- any kind of “handbook” for skills and basic first-aid - the Boy Scout handbook will do the trick

- heavy duty gloves

- surgical gloves

- antiseptic

- plastic tarp/sheet

- whistle

- signaling mirror

- a legal form of self-defense

Good luck…

Hurricane To-Do list: New York vs. The Rest Of The World -

Mon, 29 Oct 2012 11:29:43 -0400

Hurricane To-Do list: New York vs. The Rest Of The World -

The Mike Rubendall backpiece is done. Read about it at...

Wed, 24 Oct 2012 11:27:53 -0400

The Mike Rubendall backpiece is done. Read about it at http://bodysuittofit.blogspot.com/

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Fri, 05 Oct 2012 15:38:03 -0400

ever think you’d hear me say “please drink...

Thu, 27 Sep 2012 12:37:14 -0400

ever think you’d hear me say “please drink responsibly?”

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Tue, 25 Sep 2012 10:37:39 -0400